So, if tradition is to be believed, it is the season to be jolly. The decorations are up, the crap songs are on the radio and the roads are once again, jam packed.

Yesterday, I was walking outside the office and heard someone shout “Oi gayboy!!!”. At first I was a little startled, but soon realised that this noise came from a passing white van. Within the white van were 3 men laughing at this comic genius. I could of retorted, but I thought to myself “no Colin, it tis the season to be jolly and there is no need to lower yourself to their poor and comically deprived level”. Instead I muttered “fudding idiots” and continued about my business.

10 minutes later, I am in Holly’s car and I am waiting to turn into Gander Green Lane, off Watson Avenue. While I am waiting for the oncoming traffic to pass so I can turn out, the driver in the car behind me gives me a toot and ushers me to go. With all due respect to the driver behind me, I’m not exactly in a rush to collect a number of dents and scratches in my girlfriend’s car.

I have no idea why people feel the need to do this. It does not, I repeat, does NOT make me turn into the road any quicker or drive any faster. If anything, it will make me slower. I am fairly laid back when I am behind a wheel, but if I feel I am antagonised in anyway, I will slow down, position myself so you can’t overtake and make the rest of your journey behind me, a misery.

So, after waiting for the traffic, I turn into Gander Green Lane and I then drive for the next 30 yards in 2nd gear. I continue this steady pace until I reach another right turn, I indicate and promptly give him the finger as I drive off.

Merry Christmas and a happy new year fudd wit!