Two stories caught my eye recently and caused me to force out a smile. Yes, it does happen sometimes.

I loved the story about the serial shoplifter who stole 76 items from Poundland (presumably costing a grand total of £76) and then bumped into police officers in New Malden High Street with his trolley full of loot.

Hilarious.

The word “bungling” springs to mind. I’ve always loved that word in newspaper headlines. “Bungling crooks caught after officers follow footprints in snow” or “Bungling drug dealers grow cannabis on steps of police station”– that sort of thing.

Apparently his trolley was full of bathroom toiletries. The story just gets better doesn’t it?

How many toiletries does one man need? I mean, hats off to the fella for cleanliness.

Your average thieving scumbag isn’t normally known for being a good friend to the bar of soap and being clean and fragrant.

In fact, as the guy was described as “a serial shoplifter”, smelling of a particular fragrance may have been his downfall with previous crimes.

“Yes, it was definitely him officer. The one reeking of Old Spice.”

The second story that made me smile was the guy who proposed to his girlfriend after running the London marathon.

Good work. He was obviously a super fit runner because he completed the race in three hours and 27 minutes.

If that had been me I’d have been one of those jibbering wrecks stomping over the 26 mile mark – feet seemingly replace by anvils. You know the ones.

The ones they used to show on TV stumbling across the finishing line just before being whisked off to A&E.

Maybe I could have proposed in the ambulance?

How romantic.